Thoughts on Homosexuality
I’ve been meaning for a long time to transcribe my beliefs about homosexuality for others to read. In light of New York’s recent decision to legalize homosexual marriages, I’ve finally decided to just sit down and do it.
I intend to treat this as living documentation of my views, updating and expanding it as I continue to debate and discuss with others, and as I find sources to back up my opinions. By no means do I claim to have a monopoly on truth or understanding of faith, psychology, biology, etc., but it is human nature to pursue truth and understanding, and these are my findings in my personal quest.
I do love to discuss these topics with others, and if you know how to contact me and can have a civil conversation, I invite you to talk to me about your thoughts.
Marriage Equality
You’ll note by my framing of this discussion as “Marriage Equality” that I believe same-sex marriage is a matter of equal rights. Simply put, I believe religion has no place in a discussion that affects civil rights. Too many legal rights and privileges are based on marriage, that even if marriage was originally a religious institution, it is far from exclusively religious at this point.
Creating civil unions as something for the government to recognize in addition to marriage is unacceptable. As New York State Senator Mark Grisanti shared in his excellent speech explaining his vote to support marriage equality, civil unions are chaos. They create a separate-but-equal (and actually not quite equal) scenario, which we know to be unconstitutional according to Brown v. Board of Education.
The ideal solution for marriage equality is the solution that exists in the first country to legalize homosexual marriage, The Netherlands. The Netherlands has always had separate civil and religious marriage ceremonies. The government will not recognize a religious ceremony, which in its eyes is purely optional—true separation of church and state. Thus, when same-sex marriage came up, it was rather easy to amend the civil marriage code.
Unfortunately it would be far too difficult to make that separation here in the United States now, and the solution that New York has come up with is probably one of the most respectful to religious institutions that object.
Homosexuality as a Choice
Frankly, I find this argument to be insulting to homosexuals, and thus I will spend little time on it. Scientific research has found little substance to the claims that homosexuality is merely a choice. The most compelling argument to me, though, is the lives of homosexuals themselves. The LGBT community faces tremendous persecution. Coming out as gay remains a very dangerous action in much of the world. People are murdered or driven to suicide because of their homosexual attractions. That’s not something that people choose. Ironically, the only people I can think of that do choose to expose themselves to murder and persecution like this are religious ideologues, and yet it is religious ideologues who most often persecute the LGBT community.
Homosexuality and Christianity
Born That Way
I just argued that homosexuality is not a choice, so it follows that homosexuals are born homosexual. Many Christians point to our origins in the Bible and declare that God created us, male and female, to be partners for procreation—that we were created to be heterosexual. I do agree that it’s pretty clear God originally created us as heterosexuals. But that doesn’t preclude homosexuality, and in fact, it doesn’t even mean that homosexuality can’t be good and righteous just because it’s not original. Adam and Even didn’t originally wear clothing either, but Jesus was no naturist. Things that were not original can still be good. To belabor the point, kings weren’t God’s original plan for Israel either, but God worked with them. Yes, there were plenty of really bad kings, and that proved God’s point that they weren’t a great idea, but they weren’t all bad and God certainly used them. The same can be said for homosexuality. I’m not going to argue that all homosexuals are completely virtuous (see also: heterosexuals), but that doesn’t mean God can’t work through homosexuals without them “changing”.
Homosexuality and Sin
There are many who know the so-called “clobber verses” by heart. But few have studied them deeper than their English translations. Their explicit condemnation of homosexuality is at most implicit when examined through the appropriate lenses of culture and language of the author. Both Old and New Testament references to homosexual acts refer to idol worship rituals, rape, and prostitution—none of which bear any resemblance to committed homosexual partnerships, and all of which are just as repugnant in heterosexual contexts. Committed homosexual partnerships were far from normal or prevalent during the eras in which the Bible was written, and the direct audiences of these passages would have immediately recognized the practices to which they were referring.
I also believe it’s telling that while Jesus talked more about the spirit of righteousness and sin and Paul more about the practicality of each, none of Jesus' words speak directly to this issue. If anything, his words on love, his treatment of contemporary outcasts, and his overturning of legalism point much more clearly toward acceptance of homosexuals as they are. Actually, the closest Jesus came to possibly addressing homosexuality was in Matthew 8:5-13 and Luke 7:1-10. It’s very possible that the centurion and his dying “servant” were lovers; the Greek word used to describe the servant hints at this.
In addition to the miracle performed for the centurion, if you go back and really examine the relationships of Ruth with Naomi and David with Jonathan, you’ll find that both are much more than the “deep friendship” many make them out to be in Sunday School. In fact, the commitment that Ruth makes to Naomi in Ruth 1:17 very closely resembles traditional marriage vows.
For more on what the “clobber verses” are actually referring to, and other passages that affirm committed homosexual partnerships, check out The Children Are Free. This book dives deeper into the language and context of the Scriptures associated with homosexuality.
Ultimately I believe that it is up to each individual to reconcile their sin with God. In Acts 15:19, James said (when arguing with those who thought that converted Christians should be circumcised) that “we should not make it difficult for the Gentiles who are turning to God.” Now, he does continue to say that “we should write to them, telling them to abstain from [various sins]” (one of them being sexual immorality, actually, referring to the same pagan rituals, rape, and prostitution mentioned in other passages), but this was just a list of the most repugnant sins to the Jewish Christians. Romans 14:1-3 illustrates that the exact line for what is sinful can be different for different individuals, and God alone can judge. What unifies Christians is not a code of conduct, but a core set of beliefs (about who God is, what salvation is, etc.). In my book, that’s what matters.
A Word on Orthodoxy
While I am by far not the only one questioning the sinfulness of homosexuality (the book I mentioned previously should be evidence of this), I freely admit that this is a rather young movement. The orthodox viewpoint is clearly that all forms of homosexuality are sinful. Orthodoxy has its place, certainly, in rooting us and keeping us from rewriting history, but it is not perfect. Orthodox positions do evolve slowly (cf. slavery, women in the church). I find it fitting that Jesus appeared very unorthodox to his contemporaries. Granted, he had a bit of inside knowledge about God, but he also proved that humans don’t always do the best job of finding the most important beliefs and practices to uphold.
My Story
My views on this subject have evolved drastically over time. Growing up in a relatively conservative town, I assumed the position of my friends and neighbors—that homosexuality was a sin, and that’s all I needed to know. I never met an open homosexual until high school, and he was an atheist, so my views weren’t stretched at all. I never gave the subject much thought.
In college, I became friends with many people who were gay, and I was directly exposed to the “war” between the LGBT community and the Christian community. I finally started to give more thought to these subjects, examining my beliefs as I tried to figure out how to stop that “war”. Even as I was unsure of how to reconcile the morality of homosexuality, I knew the fighting was wrong. After all, the most important virtue of Christianity is love.
And then, as I was wrestling with these issues, I questioned my own identity. Yes, I too have felt attractions toward other men, and I even allowed myself to act on them for a time.
Eventually I settled on the beliefs I stated above. I do not believe that my feelings have led me to justify myself by modifying my beliefs, but rather that I was allowed to walk in others' shoes for a while and was strengthened because of it. And I’m not suppressing my feelings, either. I’m not ex-gay, and I’m happily married to a wonderful woman (who knew my history before we married). I technically lean bisexual. This is not a problem in our relationship, as I most definitely love her, and that’s all that matters.
So you see, these issues are very important to me. They affect my family and my friends, and I take it personally when the LGBT community is mistreated or persecuted. As a Christian, I believe the most important thing to remember when dealing with any issue related to homosexuality is to love above all else.
originally written June 25, 2011, last updated August 29, 2011